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Old 04-28-2006, 04:19 AM
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Shawn_in_Korea Shawn_in_Korea is offline
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Adopting while in Korea, now need advice on raising them in Korea!

So, against all odds, a young (27) single man was able to find a way to get his two boys from Korea, while living in Korea. I have tried for a year and a half and was told by everyone that there was no way for me to adopt them. Even my parents told me that I needed to give up and try another country. But I persisted and FINALLY found a nice Korean woman working at the American embassy that clued me in on what to do, and it ended up being so simple.

So, after I get my kids, we have to live in Korea for another 2 years together so I can get the visa to take them home. I just couldn't give up on the boy I had visted for so long and who even asked me in his broken English "you. me. pather." (He meant father, but Koreans confuse p's and f's.) I never answered him and he never asked again, but I have been desperate ever since. He even comes to my house to spend the weekend once every month. The other boy, is the resident "Dennis the Menace" and because of that, no one has tried to adopt him and almost no one takes him out. I gave him a chance, and he turned out to be a little angel when he is out with me. But, then again last month he did try to take a picture of me when I was showering and he was supposed to be in bed, then he says "You have a big ungdungi (butt.)" Lesson of that day, lock the bathroom door! Unfortunatly, he reminds me of my much younger brother, so I know how to deal with his pranks. They are both turning 8 this summer and I have to work fast, because there is a new law saying that once they reach 8 (I also heard 9) they get sent to a home for older boys and the new director might not be so helpful.

My question is, has anyone raised kids in Korea, more specifiacally in Seoul? The school system here is a joke and childcare costs are through the roof. Does anyone have any advice? I am only an English teacher, so I can't afford the $15,000 plus a year for the private schools here. Also, right now all my friends work during the day, when I also work, so is there some group or co-op that can help with being a safety net. There are lots of military families here, would they have that sort of thing and would they work with a civilian? Also, I am worried about how to get them ready for the move to America. I have two years, any advice on how I should prepare them for that huge move out of everything they know? They both know that they will be moving to America, but they don't understand what that means. To the kids at the orphanage it's like a fairy tale land where good kids go to find families. How do I break that illusion without hurting them? Any advice would be helpful! Just don't tell me it's impossible, because I don't listen to that anymore.
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