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I gave my son's birthmom a necklace with his birthstone in it the day we were all leaving the hospital. His birthmom had other children who were small and I don't think they even understood she was pregnant, so I didn't give her anything for them.
As for the birthmom wanting a closed adoption, I think you need to respect that and perhaps just give her some kind of keepsake in the hospital. I don't think giving the other kids anything is necessary.
Laurie
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