I have simply given a range of fees depending on who is asking. My close family members still do not know how much the fees were and would probably have a heart attack if we told them. For one friend who is seriously considering it, I told her what we paid but also explained that the first agency with a $2000 fee had a waiting list of about 3 years since they only placed 3-5 infants per year. Since our wait was about 2 weeks after the agency received our paperwork with dd then I explain and go into detail about what it covers. Since I am in MD, we are not allowed to pay for certain pbparent expenses, so this saved us some.
I am a very private person and some people can just be downright nosey. I also want to protect how dd may feel if we simply share with everyone what it costs. Almost like people look at you and know a secret or pity you or something. I want it to be private. I also have told others that ask and I cannot gauge whether they are sincere in asking or not to do thorough research before hand and I point them in the right direction. Most times, they don't follow through and this lets me know that they were simply curious in the first place!
