[tchr_678]

My husband and I completed our adoption of brothers in January. Connor is 2.75 and Dima just turned 5.

All in all -- both boys are doing fabulous. I couldn't ask for more! Since you are asking about toddlers, I'll start w/ Connor.

When we first met Connor, he was shy and scared at first - cried a lot - but quickly bonded with me and liked to be w/ me. He was hesitant around DH - as many IA kids are. He remembered us from our first trip to our second and gave us big hugs when we went back from us. It was after we got him out of the orphanage when we first really saw his personality. He is a character -- always has to make people laugh. But he definitely gets mad ... When we first got him home, when he got mad, he would just sprawl out on the floor, looking for us to pay attention to him. We'd sit by him, but ignore what he was doing. Those have stopped. He ate pretty good from the beginning -- didnt' like meat too much and still struggles with that sometimes. But, after being home for 3 mos he weighs 32 pounds and 3 ft. tall, so he's making great gains. Academically speaking, he can count to 12 now, in English, on his own. He knows all his colors and speaks about 99% of the time in English. He rarely throws temper-tantrums -- there is only one time I can recall a full blown tantrum. He is starting to have a little bit of trouble following directions, but nothing major. I really think that is more to do w/ age than anythign else. And the problem is more with Daddy than mommy. (But, daddy is working a lot more too). His attachment, thus far, is GREAT. Just last night, he sat on my lap, making faces at me and giving me kisses, all the while starring into my eyes. The only time we have to remind him of eye-contact is when he's in trouble! He is sleeping through the night and really has since we brough him home. THere was a 1.5 week span where he was waking up frequently, but he also came down with a pretty nasty cold at this time, so I think it was primarily to do with that. He is very much a mommy's boy and doesn't like to be too far from me. He likes to play with Daddy, but snuggles with Mommy. I can't say enough good things about this child -- he is truly a blessing and I love having him in my life.

Just to touch on Dima -- he's phenomenal as well. In the orphanage, when we first met him, he would not look at us, interact with us, talk to us .. NADA!! We say a few sparks of him as the week progressed, but the true Dima came out the day we took him from the orphanage. He really hasn't struggled with attachment thus far -- his eye contact is also great, he responds well to consequences, seeks us out when he needs something. His English is wonderful .. knows all his letters, how to write his name, colors, numbers, you name it. In the beginning, he was notorious for pouting .. We dont' have that anymore either.

So ... I don't know if this really answered your question. I don't see the attachment problems that others may see, so I'm not able to give advice on that. But, I can show you the other side of it -- the side I'm experiencing right now.

One word of advice, LEARN SOME RUSSIAN - - It truly was a life-saver. I think it made the transition so much easier for the boys. Imagine how scared you would be if you were taken to Russia right now - without anything you know or anyone you love. Now, imagine that you are TWO! Being able to talk to them REALLY helped their comfort level, I believe.