[StorkWatcher]

Hi! I wanted to say we were also surprised when we started the adoption process that closed isn't very common now.

We chose semi-open in the best interest of our child and the birthmother. We were afraid in the beginning of an open arrangement, picturing crazed women stalking us trying to take our baby back. Talk about old myths and a bad made-for-TV movie!

CHeck out the board here for communication between birthparents and adoptive parents. It's very insightful.

We wanted our child to know something about his background/where he came from/why he looks the way he does - basically, questions to answers he might have. We also wanted the option to have more access to medical/family history as time goes by, especially in case of emergency. And we thought maybe once he was an adult, he might want to try to contact his birthfamily. Or maybe not. But at least he wouldn't be prevented by the law.

Once we decided that, we found that children can be more well-adjusted when they have access to some answers. Adoption is a very positive and wonderful way to create a family. While we won't stress it all the time, we want it to feel very comfortable and "normal" to our son.

Also, I have a fear that something will happen to one of the birthparents (God forbid, death) and we would never know or wouldn't find out for years.

I hope our birthmom feels comfort in the fact that we can contact each other through our , if needed. And if she ever wants to see how her son is doing, she can check up on him and rest assured that she made the right decision when she chose to place him with us. (Not to trivialize her feelings about placing a child for adoption! But I hope it does make her feel better.)

PS - our agency said almost all their birthmoms request open or semi-open (with varying degrees of contact) and that their decision to place a child is made a bit easier if they know they can check on things from time to time and/or get to know their child as they grow and their adoptive parents.