Had to chime in on the Birthday thread...oh how I HATED my birthday every year. I always went along with the program, so to speak, knowing that other people wanted to celebrate that day, knowing that it was an important day for my aparents...but also knowing deep down that my birthmother was hurting. I found her almost 3 years ago (she refused contact at first), but we truly "reunited" this year and are now very close. The birthday was horrible for both of us, as I suspected. So this year, she flew cross country to spend it with me. We were able to hold each other and cry together.
Strangely enough...it STILL hurts. I am STILL dreading my upcoming birthday. I have the pipe dream that so many adoptees want, and yet I STILL hate the thought of my birthday.
So I guess I have no words of wisdom to offer here other than to say "Yep, been there, done that..." And sometimes I think there's comfort in just knowing we aren't alone and have a safe place to come and vent
