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Well, I know one thing I try to do is remember what forum I'm reading the posts in. If I'm reading a post in the foster care to adoption forum and they say, "Man, I hate how these bparents treat their kids", I know they are speaking specifically about those bparents in abuse/neglect system. kwim?
So I know there's a distinction there and I wouldn't put all bparents in that same light.
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Mom to 4 fun loving kids (adopted from foster care)
7 years into our forever family! 
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