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I was a security junky who also became determined to never find myself in such a powerless situation again. After losing my son I went to nursing school (very secure career) and later got married to someone I knew would not leave me, then after having my daughter (second born) I essentially dropped out of society for safety. Moving from NY to PA made it easier. I SAHM'd, homeschooled, homechurched, and even had a homebirth with a midwife with my thirdborn. Had absolutely no trust in institutions. Since reunion and 'seeing' why I was the way I was, I've begun to reverse that somewhat, though not totally.
Merrill
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