[wvamom]

Hi--

It sounds like you have several issues going on--you said you recently returned to work--I know that must put a lot more stress on you, time-wise (believe me, I know--I just work part-time but with 4 kids....). Not to mention the stress of being away from ds for a large part of the day, and missing him.

Then, you have the issue of not getting to see dh--that's a tough one, too. I once read from a wise person that "The best thing a dad can do for his kids is to love their mom." The point is, I think, that your marriage has to be a priority, even before the kids. I know this is hard, when job and child have such immediate time demands. But your marriage has to be on a firm footing in order to provide a stable home for children--and I know from experience that not getting to see your husband can result in more conflicts.

Then there's the stress of the unknown--the "Can I handle having another child? What will this child be like? Will he or she even like me? Will there be problems I didn't foresee?"

Here's something to think about--what would you be doing differently to work through those other issues if you weren't adopting?

Then, is there something in the adoption process that prevents you from doing those things to work through the other issues? If so, then perhaps you could work through the other issues first, then return to the "adoption" issue. If not, then it seems like the problem is not so much with the adoption as with other issues you are wanting to work through. Only you can say...


Wishing you the best...
Carolyn