[Shoshana]

I don't have time to answer this post in depth, but wanted to reply quickly.

I think the notion that there will be less of a chance of "anger" or "issues" with international adoptees is a huge myth and that parents who raise their children with this understanding are doing themselves and their children a potential great disservice. There is a fair amount of literature on the topic -- one easy to read presentation that comes to mind was written by an adoptive mother, Cheryl Register. The book is entitled "Beyond Good Intentions" and it is about raising internationally adopted children.

The notion that ANY adoptee would or should feel "grateful" is just antiquated!