Did I mess up? I don't think so but open to feedback re: teens
FD is 14. New friend was over and was on my FD's computer. New friend went on FD's instant messaging and sent a message using the b-word to one of FD's contacts. Contact is daughter of a major celebrity and new friend called contact the b word. FD wants to be an actress and I will see this celebrity at camp when FD attends acting camp. (Celebrity's kids also attending acting camp).I saw it and couldn't believe it. I was leaving so I didn't make a big deal but did the next day with FD, that I couldn't believe she would let a new friend get on her computer and call her contacts the b word and more.
FD got on voicemail with new friend and said I hated her. I took phone and said no, but that I was concerned about this behavior. Well, new friend is being vicious on the internet, saying how I'm retarded, a burn, and etc.
WHERE IS RESPECT from friends? FD is devastated, doesn't want to go to school tomorrow, has worked herself up into having a cold now. I know what FD is doing on the internet but I feel like I'm the only parent who cares. Should I have just "let it go" with the new friend? What friends do this to other's computers? Most of FD's friends think I'm crazy now and she doesn't want to go to her school.
I teach high school so I'm with teens every day and in fact many students talk to me about their lives. I'm not conservative but my FD's bioparents are both addicts. One's in prison for attempted murder of his own dad during a drug binge and Bio-M is on methadone among other things. Psychiatrist says FD is majorly prone to addiction.
FD has mentioned wanting to try drugs - I think she already has. She has a physical Tuesday. Should I have her drug tested? FD was my Little Sister for 7 years before coming to live with me last year. I can't handle a druggie in my house and the lies, etc that go with it. It's hard enough raising her.
Should I have let it go with the new friend? I feel like I was being a responsible parent on the one hand about what i will tolerate in my house, but it seems that all other parents don't do stuff like that.
Am I nuts?
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