[desperatemom]

Hi everyone,
I am having a really hard time lately and I guess I just need to vent or complain. My Rad daughter is 4 and she is beautiful. Well she is when she is sleeping.. She has gotten worse. The med she was on "seriquil" is nolonger working and she is just bouncing non-stop. She is now hitting her sister (3) and stealing all her toys. My husband is at wits end because she is lying so much. I try to explain that this is all part of her sickness, and he does understand but it is so fustrating. The thing is, he is her favorite. Daddy does no wrong and he gets all the hugs and kisses etc. I am always on the outside looking in.. Quite frankly that SUCKS! But the problem is, I can see them pulling apart because he gets fustrated with her and is actually starting to avoid her where before he would seek her out. I don't even think he realizes it. I am so sad for both of them because he is the strongest bond she has had. We are in therapy and we have a psycologist too. I don't know I am just so tired, tired tired. I feel like I have no happiness in my life right now. My husband is starting his own business and I want to support him, after all he made all my dreams cometrue it is his turn. I want to be a good mother to my other 2 children who mind you are very happy go lucky, and I am so afraid they are going to loose that in all this, and I just want to be around people who think I am a good mother. My daughter has to be kept on short reign so to speak because if I give her too much freedom or any at all, she cn't handle it. I get a lot of constructive feedback from people who don't understand... i wish they would just but out! On a good note I am attending a rad confrence with my social worker.. maybe they can show me how to deal so i can teach her.. i love my daughter, but i feel a lot of resentment due to her behaviors and how much it hurts her and our whole family.. sorry for the bum post, but if you read the whole thing thanks for listening.