[sfbaymom2000]

I know two single mom's who adopted each were matched with a single girl. One was two years old, the other was three. Two married friends were matched with single girls: one at 18 months, the other at 4 years old. We were matched with out daughter 8 months after we applied. She was almost 4. We finalized 14 months after we applied.

The only thing I would caution you is to only take children quite a bit younger than your daughter. I think 9 is too old if your daughter is 11. I would think up to 7 years old might be good.

If you were matched with a child who was sexually abused, you want to make sure your daughter is safe. Kids with such a history will often try inappropriate behaviors with other kids, even older kids.

Even though you have great intentions, I would also think very carefully before taking a sibling group, and would limit it to two kids if you do. Before you do this it is hard to imagine how truly difficult it can be (at times) to live with a traumatized child and deal with the behavior issues. I would really recommend that you read Attaching in Adoption by Deborah Gray and A Child's Journey Through Placement by Vera Fahlberg.

Good luck!