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My name is MJ. I am a mom by adoption through our state of Oregon.
Our first son, we have a closed adoption. We sought out extended bfamily (took 3 years) and now I have contact with the amoms of 6 of his siblings, and the maternal great-grandparents.
We have a semi-open adoption with our youngest son. We have a mediated agreement with the bfather who is incarsarated. We agreed to letters once a year but left it open as to our comfort level for further contact. We have openness with his mother though and sisters (paternal grandma and aunts) who have been fairly respectful of our space. We did a mediated agreement with the grandma for 2 updates a year and physical contact as agreed upon mutually, all correspondance by P.O. box.
I am not the biggest fan of open adoption in our kinds of cases. It really is a case-by-case determination. The openness with our youngest son's bfamily has created a lot of anxiety with our oldest son.
MJ
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Mommy by adoption to 2 beautiful boys, one born in '01, the other in '03. Now mommy to a new little girl born in '08, full bio to our oldest son. This adoption is in progress. We adopted through Oregon's DHS.
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