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I would also like to add that I am her only family here. The rest of the Bio-Family live on the otherside of the country. Something like 6000Km's away.
I think that is what has got me most worried. What would they be thinking, she is over here by herself. Would they blame me for it? As i'm 'the outsider' in the family, the one with the least history known about. What on earth can they be thinking and talking about amonst themselves over in Newcastle?
I know logically it is not my fault as it has been coming on for years apparently and it is the reslult of lifestyle choices that she has made in the past. So I should not feel guilty but I still get these thoughts of 'What if I were a more loving son, would the inevatable heart attack have been prolonged until such time that she is back in Newcastle and thus where she is closer to her 'real family'.
Am I being harsh? Or is this natural feeling seeing as I don't have the same history?
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