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Originally Posted By Linda

I have heard those things myself. I can tell you a couple of other things also.

My Uncle's wife (Aunt only by marriage)who is an adoptive parent herself (adopted a wonderful man, whom I adore, when he was an infant) was so ignorant when I was telling her about me getting the kids last April. We were going to a wedding shower and were sitting around chatting and she says,"Why in the world would you want to adopt those kids?( with a nasty sneer on her face) They are taking all of white man's jobs and they are going to take over the world!" My children are Hispanic. My jaw just fell to the floor. Luckily my older sister, who works for the state job service office, said, " Well, you know THEY are the only ones who want to work! You don't know how many wonderful WHITE BOYS are sitting on their ***** waiting for a handout!" Bravo sis!! I did mutter something but rather than start a brawl with my Aunt with everyone else there I just chose to ignore her existance. She is NOT invited to my wedding, where my three gorgeous, bright and wonderful children will be my attendents. Unfortunately her husband is my godfather and I love him very much. I have known her all my life and she is a real "christian" and I can't believe this would be her philosophy.

#2 When I first brought the kids home I took a couple of months off of work. My supervisor is a real jerk who forbade anyone from contacting me. I felt so bad receiving absolutely no phone calls from people I had worked with for four years. We are also an all woman agency and that made it all the more strange. Anyway, for years I have contributed when someone was pregnant and we threw them a shower and bought lovely gifts. We had the parties at our monthly staff meetings and I always gave generously. Well, not only were they forbidden to contact me but nothing, absolutely nothing was done for me or my children. No welcome home cards or congratulatory cards. No come and bring the kids to visit. NOTHING! And we were really struggling. I got absolutely no foster care money for three months and the kids had no clothes to start school in. It was a rough time. Even a gift certificate for dinner out or something would have been nice. McDonalds even. I was really hurt. Then to rub salt in the wound, my supervisor called around Christmas to invite my family to a puppet show at the local college on a Sunday. At work on Friday I wasn't feeling well so SHE cancelled us going. Said we'll do something for you some other time. Just like she said she wanted me to bring them to the office sometime because they wanted to do something and never followed through. Know why I don't feel bad about quitting? I can't wait. I did have one woman at the office who gave the kids stuffed beanie buddies, beanie babies, McDonalds gift certificates, and $50.00 in cash for Christmas. I cried. She was a foster/adopt mother though. She understood. When I quit she shouted, "Hooray!!"

Sorry this is so long, but I have faced it also. Ignore their ignorance. I think you speaking up was great! I don't think others though will ever understand and it is something we have to deal with.