[dadfor2]

there are so many things that come into play, and one of them is 'how fast should the transition be?'

i feel it is so different for each child, but i also believe age plays a big part in it. The younger the child, the quicker the transition.

I also want to say that i cant even imagine what you went through, and thats why we could never be foster parents.

but i think the biggest thing to remember is that the child should feel that this 'adoption thing' is a good thing, and happy thing....not a sad thing.

If the child did see you break down, he might think something was wrong and that could actually impact his attachment to his adoptive parents for a long long time.

so, i can see why they did the transition that way. the child cannot think this was a bad thing at all.

did you get the phone number of the adoptive parents, maybe you can call them to check in and see how hes doing.

i wish i can say they did the wrong thing, but im not sure if they did. I wasnt there to see how upset you got and if you were able to hide those feelings from the child. from the sound of your post, it was diffulcult, it seemed it was diffulcult for you and thats why they did that.

It is clear from your post, you are a great foster parent. Its clear you truly loved your foster kid

I cant even imagine the hurt you feel. I am so sorry that it couldnt be smoother for you and the little guy.

but i also think its important for you to at least give a call to see how he is doing. you played a very important role in this child life, and the child shouldnt keep losing people who are important to him.