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Amy, I'm so sorry you are having to go through this. I can imagine turning down a referral is an awful feeling. Don't be hard on yourself- you must do what is right for you and your husband. There is a family out there for that child, and there will be another child (hopefully soon) that will be a perfect fit for your family. Good luck and hang in there!
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Christie 
Mommy to Viktor, adopted March 2006
Krasnodar, Russia
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