[specialcricket]

I understand how you feel about it never being a good fit. Having two four year olds almost puts me over the edge some days. I have promised myself I will never accept another child the same age as mine. I can do babies all day, but not 4 year olds that compete and fight about everything. I have felt guilt over not being able to do it "forever" and thought how could I make it work, but in the end I know I can't.

So know you are not alone and "your kids" will come along. You have learned valuable lessons with this placement. Hang in there.