[lippylulu]

I became extremely depressed the first month home with our 8 year old daughter. Part of it was because my husband had cancer surgery 5 days after we got home (thank goodness he is ok now), part of it was because I was so exhausted from the traveling and a relentless sinus infection, and part was because our daughter almost immediately began acting out with behaviors and emotional meltdowns. I was just so tired and overwhelmed even though I considered myself educated and prepared for the experience. There were times when I just broke down to tears, but this actually seemed to help my relationship with my daughter because she would usually come over and hug ME---not exactly the healthiest dynamic but it surely wasn't a disaster. The worst part was feeling like I was not allowed to feel depressed or complain. Afterall, we waited forever for his child...how could I now complain about how hard it was? Once I admitted this to some people, I started feeling better. The depression lasted about 4-6 weeks. Now, we are home 4 months, and I can honestly say we are ALL doing as well as anyone could hope. I do not feel my depression had a negative impact. That being said, if it had gone on much longer, I DO think it would have set a bad precedent and would have negatively impacted how I ultimately handled my daughter's emotional and behavioral issues. My best advice is not to be afraid to admit your feelings to others, and to get professional help right away. What a difference it made for me!