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We have friends who adopted domestically many years ago. They kept a photo album handy of pictures when they went to pick up their daughter and when the relatives came to see her, etc. From the time she was very little, they would show her the pictures and talk about when they went to get her, etc. She grew up knowing she's adopted and they talked about it often, but casually, so it has never been an issue for her. She is now 18.
Because of that, we began talking to our girls about it (again, just casually) at a very young age, too. They are 6 and 4 now. They know that they came out of someone else's tummy, but we have told them that God knew from the beginning of time that we would be their mommy and daddy and that He brought us together as a family. They also know that "the lady whose tummy they came out of loved them VERY much, but she was so poor that she just couldn't take care of them and she wanted them to have food and clothes and a warm bed. They seem to understand that they were very loved by their birthmother and they are very loved by us. Right now, that's all that really matters to them.....so they have just accepted it. They both go through
stages where they want to hear "their" story.
Their stories always start out...."Once upon a time, there was a mommy and daddy who were very sad and lonely because they had no children. They prayed and asked God to bring them the child that He had meant just for them." Etc...........
I don't think there is any one good time to sit down and "tell" them; I think it needs to just somehow be part of their life from the beginning.
Just my feelings..............
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annelisa
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