[Pamsko]

I'll temper this post with a not so pleasant story, but one that is having a happier and happier ending.

Alex came home at 17 months. We were his 4th family (birth family for 6 months, foster mom #1 for 6 months, foster family #2 for almost 6 months) -- Lots of changes for our little guy.

The first 6 months, he just lived with us. . .I don't know how to explain it any other way. He'd interact with our family, but only as a visitor would. I'm not sure how much he'd been prepared for his adoption, the foster family we met was wonderful, so I think they tried. But Alex is quite strong-willed and stubborn and very, very smart. Every time we had people over, I could see him emotionally preparing himself to leave us. . .our lawn service guy came to the door one day to pick up payment and was talking with Alex in Spanish. Alex ran and got his shoes. . . I'm sure he thought he was finally going "home" -- especially since this guy was speaking spanish to him. We spoke some spanish to him (in our horrible american accent) but that just seemed to confuse him more, so we stopped and went strictly English.

Then, he began to relax a bit as he passed the 6-month line. . .he adores my dh, but it's a very insecure attachment. You could say that he's prepared for Ed to disappear from his life forever. . . and used to cry and cry if Ed even went to the bathroom. That behavior has finally almost gone away.

Alex has been home with us a year now and there's still a few "bad" days. But nothing like when he first came home. He still does not speak--much. Now, when he first came home he said NOTHING.. . he didn't babble or anything. He's started babbling, and says a few identifiable words (ball, book, car), but nothing like what a 2.5 year old should say. Early start is coming out to evaluate him at the end of January and we're hoping that he's just having a slow transition to english and that it's not an emotional problem.

Having said ALL that (sorry so long), I can tell you that I can't imagine my life without Alex. He has brought us such joy and is such a sweet, sweet, helpful child.

So, despite the doom and gloom beginning, there is light at the end of the tunnel. I'd just say to read all you can, prepare yourself for the worst, and then go for it. I don't regret one minute of it!

Loving my boys --