[crick]

I just want to add a little thing here...

When our kids are placed with us, the changes and upheaval are so overwhelming. Yes, we have rules and yes they need to be followed. The routine is ever so necessary and important.

It's also important to realize that not every issue can be addressed at the same time. Things take time and you can't focus on every single issue at once. Pick a few things to work on and leave some room for compromise too. Their fight for survival needs to include some wins here and there too. Not wins over you, but wins for themselves that they still have a voice, their opinion counts and someone will understand them and care about their voice.