[Navy_RP_Wife]

Mahalo for all of the great advice. As I sat here reading all of the responses, I got to thinking to myself. When B, the 3 year, gets into so much trouble, I will tell him he is not able to play in is room he shares with our bio son,K, and his sister, M. We moved his toy box into the dining room and he has to play in the living room where I can see him at all times ( we live in a small 1 story house). These are the times that he is the best. Based on this prehaps the time ins would work better for him. so I will give this a try. When speaking with the kids worker, she told me he was just potty trained in May when they were put into the system AGAIN, so he is still new to pottying. We try very hard to not let M or K do for B, that we get what he needs or wants, but simply, 3 kids run us ragged and sometimes it just happens. But M is realizing she needs to stop, that it is not healthy for her. We remind her all the time that her job in our home is to be a kid and she is learning that very well. The counselor told us it is a small miracle M is making improvements that can be seen! Which made us feel so happy!! M told the counselor that when mom would leave them alone she would cry because she was scared but that B never cried. Probably because the one constant person for him was M. As for B, he told us to hang in there it will happen for him too. We have discover that B thinks if he is naughty we will call the worker to send them someplace else and he thinks it will be with mom, not another fh. So we tell him all the time that we love him and when mommy is better thats when they can go home but that they will be staying with us until then. Eventually he will believe us. Sometimes, I just feel like I could sit down and cry other the things that these kids have seen and experienced and other times I want to scream at the state for even thinking about sending these kids home again!! The reason mom gave for her relapse is because "it is too stressful to parents these kids." From what M tells us, confirmed by the worker, mom terrorized these kids about fh and the police. She was leaving the kids alone to go clubbing or whatever and told M if she called the police they would take her and B away and put them in a fh again where they would be beaten, never see her )mom) again, mom would go to jail, etc.

These two our first placements and are just breaking our hearts! I do not understand what this state is thinking to even consider sending them home again. But they say mom is treating this time around completely different and admitted that she was not ready for her kids to come home yet. Please pray for these kids, that their situation will be resolved in a manner that is best for them.

Mahalo!