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How young is this birth mom? Sounds childish to me to call herself the baby's cousin. Personally, I wouldn't go along with the deception. I would worry more about being untruthful to your child than angering the birth mom. I agree talking to her about this is a good idea.
Hmm, you have to respect the birth mom? She is the baby's birth mom, not yours, right? Would be better for your child if you respect her even if it is solely because of her relationship to your child. Don't have to like her necessarily, but, that'd be healthier for your child too if you did. She is still one of the mothers of your/her child whether you like or respect her or not though.
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