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I would agree with your first instinct - it's the whole family or none of the family. Tough I know - I'm going through it with my own family. But, I don't want bio kid to learn from a negative example and I don't want akids to be treated unfairly. Really, there is no reason to continue contact...
This is the family we chose - the family you chose. If they love US, they would love our children. End of story!
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