[momm2be]

I am cleaning out my adoption file and found this. It meant enough to me at the time to save it in several places.

Adoption (vs pregnancy) means...

...."interviewing" for the role of parent, and someone else has the power to determine whether or not you become parents

...photographs not ultrasounds

...a countdown of the days every month, not for ovulation, but to know when the next newsletter will come, so that you know how much closer you are

... "delivery" (referral) via FedEx

...the first 24 hours of parenthood in a country where you don't speak the language and in airplanes and airports

...feeling like you are carrying a secret, because you are emotional, anxious, excited, and stressed but there is no visual body clue for the outside world to understand why

...international politics directly impact your family in a very real way

... the gestation period of an elephant

...draining your savings account, while watching other expectant parents have insurance that covers their prenatal expenses

...a window for a "due date" (Gotcha Date) that can be as long as an ENTIRE human pregnancy

...having no control over the prenatal care, nursing or newborn care of your own child

...having no ability to make decisions about medical care or immunizations for your child for the first 6-12 months

...feeling like you are taking your child away from his/her mommy

...buying clothes and the learning your child has outgrown them before you even get to put him in them

...feeling like you have to sustain a certain level of excitement for "show", but knowing it's an emotional rollercoaster, not a two-year high

...not being sure where and when you officially fit in the "mommy" category

...celebrating milestones (6-month birthday, ability to roll over) without the person who achieved them

...falling in love with a photograph

...seeing your world open up to include a family (or two) on the other side of the globe

...not being able to hear, see, touch you child for the first 6-12 months of their life

...did I mention, falling in love with a photograph?