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Thanks
Sharon and Marilyn thanks for your replies.
Sharon - I can't believe they laughed at you for calling a meeting. But you know in our situation they did a "hand off" in the parking lot (literally) and they think that WE did harm by keeping them for one day - RIGHT! When I think of the nerve... it's unbelievable.
You know, I am still in shock that our agency social worker was just so "final" about it. It's funny how when you are paying money and doing everything "their" way how things go smoothly but the minute you do what is right for your family you can't be trusted again and get zero support. I asked our agency social worker SEVERAL times "what if it doesn't work out?" She would never give a straight answer - but if she had EVER once said if you change your mind you don't get a second try with us, um I am positive I would have gone with another agency.
The first presentation we went to we were in an old victorian house (social services) and they had just painted the inside, it was summer and hot and they couldn't open windows on second level. My husband is a police officer so he was tired from work, the lack of cool air and paint fumes were getting to him. Our agency worker told us the county workers said they would never place a child with us because my husband was "unresponsive." Can you believe it? I was totally dumbfounded because we thought the presentation went well, although we decided not to take the placement. Then I asked "is there anything we can do to change their minds?" Well, our agency worker said, yes, you can have your husband call and sort of apologize... RIGHT... my husband wouldn't do that, he doesn't think there is any reason why they should have judged us like that and doesn't want to deal with people like that. It's a wonder why there are so many kids that suffer in the system.
With the situation where we had the girls removed, I was so digusted that I let our agency handle the loose ends and never called the county worker back - I am sure we are blacklisted there too.
We are a young couple and we have a lot to offer - I just can't believe that we've had to deal with all this crap, especially after enduring infertiity, it just really sucks. Our friends and family want to help but they don't know how, really there is nothing that they can do except keep their ears open.
Marilyn - thanks, I have thought about contacting another agency. I actually contacted a person who does homestudies only, I had contacted her before we hired our current agency. I looked to her for advice on this situation. She said we could switch to her agency but CO laws have changed since July when our homestudy was approved so we could not transfer our homestudy we have to do it ALL over again plus pay her... we really don't have the money to do that not to mention don't want to do it all over again since we JUST did it over the summer. I really feel stuck right now. I have not called other agencies, mainly because I feel fragile still. We are not sure that we can try foster/adopt again because of the risk of ending up with a failed placement again and also being blacklisted from a couple of counties for no good reason (truly).
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