[sugarbabysmommy]

I absolutey understand and agree with you that any negative feelings the birthfather *may* have toward the birthmother not be directed at you. It's reasonable to say hey, we hear ya, we get that you're po'ed, but the person you really need to come to terms with is the birthmother, and if we're going to get to know one another we can't be put in the middle- if you are ever put in that position- IF. I also understand your desire to go through the what if scenarios about how you'd handle the call, and this is where your agency should help you. Give them a call, talk with a counselor and do some role playing. I think it's fine to have a game plan, so long as you recognize that all these things you fear so much are only posibilities and NOT absolutes. It's ok to be flexible.

It sounds like you are waiting at home to be pounced on. What will it take for you to feel better, to stop worrying? Because just sitting at home waiting for what might or might not happen isn't helping you. Even posting here is only helping (I sense) a small amount.