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I just put myself in dd's bdad's place and thought about how it felt. I can't imagine why he should trust us. He may wish he could, but there's no real reason for him to trust us. and reading the bparent boards, it's clear that there are many folks who feel they have been burned in this "game". it was a no brainer for us.
For me adoption works this way - padoptive parents take a major risk in accepting a placement and waiting for all the paperwork to be signed and for finalization. bparents take the risk placing their child with some other family, hoping that those aparents will keep their word. My risk as an aparent went on for about 16 months (slow finalization in CA). my daughter's bparents' risk goes on forever. Given that, I felt it was the least I could do, to cut that risk down somewhat.
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-first time amom to dd, born 7/7/04
-placed in our arms by a very loving bmom 7/9/04
-bfather's rights terminated 9/7/04
-just connected with bdad!!! 2/9/05
-visited bfamilies for a week, awesome trip 6/05
-bfather signed legally binding open adoption
agreement 7/05
-finalized (woohoo!) 18th of November 2005
-Thinking about adoption #2!
[color=Purple] Support All Families. Advocate for the Return of the Non-Traditional Families Forum
Last edited by FH-LisaCA : 12-02-2005 at 02:40 PM.
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