|
Yikes, this is a hard one. On the one hand--she has never asked for money before. Our son's bmom started asking for money in the hospital and never stopped. We got every story in the world. So, that is a good sign that she has not made this a habit with you before.
We also were also given many reasons for WHY she needed money and many were legit sounding--but ultimatly we found that they were all lies. We DID give her money at times, but we knew she was probably lying about why she needed it. I like the advice about giving it as a gift, not a loan. This way you can manage your expectations. Be aware that once she asks, if she is not being totally truthful about it, it will be easier for her to ask again. If she legitimatly needs it--she will use it for what all of us need occasionally, a boost to get her over the bumps life throws at us occasionally.
On that note: there are several charities that help people in her situation. We know about them because we helped our bmom get hooked up w/ them. We felt that they could be a better filter for what her needs really were then we could be. I am not affiliated w/ them in any way and make no claims about them beyond the fact that they exist! One is called Modest Needs. Here is their philosophy from their website "Most persons living paycheck to paycheck earn just barely too much to qualify for any type of conventional assistance. This means they can't receive the help they need to overcome a short-term crisis - until they've already lost everything.
Modest Needs exists because we think there's a better way to do things. As far as we're concerned, no hard-working person should ever have to choose between taking a child to the doctor and putting food on the table."
So true!
There is another one that is specifically for cancer patients that need help during the hard first months of their diagnosis. I just read about it in People Magazine in the last few weeks. It does things like pay backlog on utitlities, pay a month or two of rent, etc. Most things are less then $500. The name slips my mind. Also, most states have an "emergency rent" program. They will pay one months rent for people who may not normally qualify for housing help. It is a one time thing and for emergencies like this. Again, I think the point is to help people over their crisis before they are so far gone that they loose everything. It would be through the state.
Good Luck. :-)
|