[icunurse]

Personally, I'd stay in a hotel, at least for this visit. Not only to give everyone some quiet during the night and give you/DH some breathing room, but just to give bmom some time/space, too. The first visit(s) might be harder than she can even imagine right now, so while she may not think it will be a problem, she may also not know exactly how she will feel. And I think to have to deal with 2 whole weekends of it would be really hard. You could always try and book a hotel with a very liberal cancellation policy (several let you cancel mere hours before arrival and don't charge a cancellation fee). That way, it's there if you need it, but you can cancel if things go well. I would also make a point of mentioning your trip dates to bmom, as she may choose to not come home that weekend (if she thinks it is too much too soon) or at least give her some time to prepare. Good luck.