[becky]

thanks Elizabeth...I guess I do 'know' that what you say is correct...it's just painful to think I will ever have to tell her some of the things I have learned.

The situation isn't really awful...but it's going to be hurtful...I know that much. I guess my biggest fear is that when I tell her what I have learned she is going to think I am trying to "paint an ugly picture" of her birthfamily. I know so many adopted children have that vision of the perfect/saintly birthfamily. I don't want to be the one to crush that vision for her.

I know I have to be strong and know that eventually she will realize that I am just the messenger...but without anyone else around to lash out at, I am pretty sure it's going to be me since I am the one who is going to share the news. Oh well...no one ever said parenthood was easy!

Thanks for your response...it is very helpful to hear your experiences.