[LisaCA]

hi,

i'm not from texas (though I did live there for my kindergarten year in Corpus Christi ) so I'm just going to generalize.

There are white children in the foster care system, but my guess is that they are of "higher demand" than other children (latino and AA). (Fyi, children considered "white/other" will often look more "other" than "white".) Infants or young children are definitely in higher demand across the races. add all that together and it means possibly waiting a long time to adopt thru the foster care system in texas. Also most infants, unless there parent has had previous removals of children, are adopted thru private or agency adoption. Other infants may be placed with the aparents of their siblings in an effort to keep the children together.

I suspect there are possibly agencies that will let you specify sex, but what do you do if the ultrasound is wrong? If I were an expectant mom looking at the profiles, I'd shy away from anyone specifying gender without a good reason-jmho. you might want to have a chat with dh and explain that we don't always get what we want in life , and his baby boy as number one may be one of them. if that's what he wants and he sticks to it, and if you're able to find an agency that will work with you, you may end up waiting longer because of it-that's my guess.

one way out of it would be to be open only to those children already born (another longer wait I suspect).

not sure why dh wants a boy, but as a girl, let me say I'm more of a boy than dh . I played an awesome game of football and tennis, lifted weights, fixed cars etc. had I been born more recently I'm sure I'd have been on the football team in school. So if he's looking for a sports legend or a child he can play sports with, girls can do that too (and do it well). hey, we're convinced dd will be the first female mlb player-you should see her room, definitely baseball inspired .

if it's some other reason, he should think about why, what his expectations are of a boy and of a girl. he may find that an interesting exercise. my guess is that you're "discussing" that with him already .

good luck!

Lisa